The Paradoxical Secret Superpower of Great Leaders

It’s easy to believe that leadership requires being out in front. We’re constantly shown images of leaders who are brash, loud, me-centric extroverts who promote their own brands, hoard LinkedIn “likes,” and count social media followers like gold coins. But the most impactful leaders flip this script.

In today’s ego-driven world, humility seems almost countercultural, but real leadership isn’t about the one. It’sabout the many. It’s fed by a desire not for personal success, but for the success of your organization and the people it employs and serves.

I’ve known a few know-it-alls, and I imagine you have too. Some are overly confident, others are just incurious, but they’re all set in their ways, resistant to change, and defensive. I’ve met know-it-all baseball coaches and seasoned senior executives who thought they knew everything there was to know about baseball or business. And many of them did, in fact, know a lot—more than I did. I, however, know more now than I used to, and they’ve plateaued.

The humble learn-it-all, by contrast, knows they don’t know it all. Because they don’t need to be the constant center of attention, they listen more than they talk. They’re not too proud to ask questions when there’s a gap in their knowledge, and they don’t pretend to expertise they don’t have. As a result, they’re unafraid of being “found out.” 

In this fearlessness is the first paradox of humble leadership--humility requires confidence. Admitting that you made a mistake, don't know all the answers, or cannot immediately determine the correct approach to a problem makes you vulnerable–something people lacking in confidence are often unwilling to do. The humble leader’s ability to be vulnerable and stay, at least temporarily in uncertainty, frees them to learn from their mistakes, gather new data and diverse opinions, and find innovative solutions rather than stubbornly sticking with the tried-and-failed responses, outdated information, and preconceived notions.

The second paradox is one of perception. To the less confident, humility can look like weakness, but it requires extraordinary strength. The basis of ongoing growth and personal development—honest self-appraisal—is often uncomfortable and takes real character while the rewards of high-performing, empowered, learn-it-all teams requires letting go of control and trusting others. Finally, it takes self-restraint to check self-serving impulses and give your team the credit when things go well and courage to step up and take personal responsibility when they don’t.

 Humble leaders focus on developing people over making themselves look good. They hire a diverse team of coachable learn-it-alls from whom they, themselves, can learn. Some managers may hesitate to bring high-caliber talent on board in the mistaken belief that these new hires might outshine them. This is entirely the wrong attitude. A great leader wants to find the best minds available, and not only for the organization's benefit. Humility allows such leaders to seek out not people who will make them look great and flatter their egos with blind agreement but those who are, themselves great and consistently challenge themselves, their teammates, and their leaders to learn and grow.

The paradoxical superpower of great leaders is that while they strive to get better at the core skills of leadership, they think less about leading than the people they lead and serve. They’re confident enough to be vulnerable and strong enough to look weak. They’re leaders because they are people others want to follow—not because they’re out in front waving their own flag but because they’re invested in their people’s success. They may not be as visible as a superhero, but they’re changing the world. Paradoxically, the leaders you most want to watch are the hardest to see.

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